One of the things that is often said of those working within any industry is that you cannot have it both ways.

A hobby cannot be dragged kicking and screaming into the realm of a profession without losing your passion for it during your free-time.  A professional model kit builder will rarely go home at the end of a day at work to build more model kits for fun.  A hobby is a hobby.  A job is a job.  Though the two may initially intermingle, eventually they always go their separate ways.

Naturally, entering this new world of gaming being part of my profession concerns me.  The idea that I could essentially lose an eighteen-year-old hobby is rather daunting.  To play only when necessary?  To think of playing games only as part of my job?  Though it does not essentially detract from the overall love of something, the idea of having to put gaming in one specific box of my life almost borders on terrifying.

It’s been a few months now, and it’s early days.  But if anything, I’ve found being a part of Frag Dolls UK has somewhat renewed my interest in gaming as a whole.  Sometimes you can become so familiar with something, you cease to look at it properly.  Sometimes being comfortable is also being lazy.  And then you become jaded.  Bored.  Disillusioned.  Walking down that old familiar high street going into the same familiar music shop.  Going to the same familiar music section.  Picking up the same familiar artists. 

Or, in my case, picking up the same familiar games.

There’s always the argument that games aren’t as good as they used to be.  Not as original, inventive, creative, daring, exciting.  Gaming has sold out.  Gaming is diluted.  Gaming is dying.  It can be difficult being interested in something that moves so quickly, all too often finding yourself feeling alienated by the new generation who thinks that Oh Mummy is a sequel staring Rachel Weisz.

I know, because I’ve felt jaded too.  Gradually you find looking for a game that interests you becomes harder and harder, and then maybe, one day, you just stop.

I’m not going to lie.  Since joining Frag Dolls UK, I’ve been playing games I wouldn’t have batted an eyelid at before – even whole genres.  Take King Kong for instance.  Yeah, sure, it’s pretty, but it’s an action adventure.  I don’t do action adventures.  I’m flicking through my mind trying to recall the last action adventure game I played and I honestly can’t remember.  Sure, the Broken Sword series might fall into that category, but for me it was too text based, and the point and click element swung it more into the realms of RPG in my mind.

And yet, less than one week ago, I sat down and played Kong.  And I mean played it.  Not for five minutes before pretending I’d been distracted by the new Terry Wogan advert, or claiming my blood sugar level has dropped so I need to run to KwikSave and grab a pack of Lion bars.  Played it.

And I liked it.  Initially, sure, the Lion bars and Terry Wogan would have enticed me away within seconds, but because there could be no excuses, because it was important that I focussed my attention on this game, I had to give it a chance.  And I liked it.  My only quibble was that I wish I’d had more time to play it so I could see what happened next!

And Burnout: Revenge.  If it hadn’t been for Sarin raving about this game, I would never have bothered.  A racing game?  Are you sure? 

I’m re-discovering all of those wonderful things I’d forgotten.  Just this evening, one hour of my life was dedicated to playing Nintendogs in the bath.  Do you have any idea how powerful that makes me feel?

And when I walk into a game shop, I’m not mentally blanking out eighty-percent of titles.  I’m actually looking at them again.  I’m actually taking the time to flick through games magazines and read reviews, not just glance at a couple of screen shots and have my mind made up for me.

I am the kid in the candy shop who has just discovered an entire new shelf of lollypops.

I can’t say whether or not this upwards trend will continue.  Perhaps this is just an initial stage of euphoria, before the inevitable kicks in, I don’t know.

Until then, I’m enjoying this mini-regeneration of gaming-Jam.  It’s good to keep an open mind about things, and even a weirdo like me can forget this sometimes.

So roll on new experiences. 

Or, in the words of Mr Kong

“Grrr.”