Well now I know, I know the origin. No longer are they merely an attachment, an obligatory part of him. They have become an item with a background, a life story - how exciting! It turns out that an old lady named Goldstein created Ebony and Ivory. They were her masterpieces, her final work. She made them because normal guns could not take the fire power that Dante expected of them, and she was constantly trying to make him better ones. They were handed over to Dante just as he realised who he really was, and watched her burn to death. Lovely.

I have one man to thank for this revelation in my life, and that man is a member of our humble Frag Doll forum - we call him Arc. Arc has long known of my fanatical love of all things Dante (that’s the main character of the original Devil May Cry, and the red coated ‘baddie’ in the recent one for those of you who have been hiding under a rock.) He decided out of the goodness of his heart to send me the first Devil May Cry book.

It is a lovely thing, with a hint of graphic novel and a little post script telling me how they collaborated with Capcom to make it as realistic as possible. It took me less time to read than one level on Dante Must Die mode - and what an insight!

Apparently the book was created to shed some light on the mysteries of the first Devil May Cry game for the PS2. And I think it kinda does. I am unsure as to whether I like Neo Angelo’s introduction, but the rest rolls over the eye balls in a delightful way… Unlike the actual, current game that reduces me to tears! I don’t know why I keep hearing people suggesting that it is a breeze until you unlock the more challenging difficulties. I am tearing my hair out from Devil Hunter, to the point that I have given up.

Giving up is not a bad thing, and neither is it ia sad thing - it is in fact the clever way. I have reverted to ‘easy’ human mode. This allows me to defeat each boss first time, without wasting my precious vital stars, whilst raking in the red orbs, the achievements, and upping my abilities and life bar. I think the appropriate phrase here is ‘Go Me’.

So there you go. I have become a book reading, easy gaming lady. So cultured and smart. I might just file my nails now and have a cup of tea.