Jan 24, 1:40 pm
I have noticed during my time as a Fragdoll that some people are just a little sceptical towards our gaming abilities. This scepticism has many roots but one of the more prominent ones is that we are girls. Can girls really play games, and if so can they actually be any good at them?? I set my overactive mind to wondering if there was any truth in this line of questioning and in order to ponder this I felt a comparative study is in order. Low and behold I give you the first draft:
- Hands: Women have little stubby hands that can’t possibly hold a controller properly……and men have big man hands that wield a controller as a powerful weapon or tool.
- Hand eye coordination: Women do not have this skill. They repeatedly poke out their own eyes. Men on the other hand play sports and thus have uber skills honed by years of ball catching *cough*
- Discipline: Women lack the discipline to complete a game; they are fickle creatures who will abandon even the most engrossing game to answer the phone. Men have lost their senses of hearing and reason in order to become better gamers.
- Hair: how can any woman possibly claim to be a gamer when we all know how hard those xbox live headsets are to untangle from flowing locks.
- Lung capacity: Women have a smaller lung capacity then men, this is a medical fact. So how in the world are they supposed to yell loudly enough down a mic to intimidate their opponents into submission?
- Good looking-ness: Some women are clearly too hot to play games… surely they just spend all day preening in the mirror?? If they are not hot they are ugly, and ugly women are too ugly to play games! (Men apparently do not want to imagine the person whose hot elf incarnation they have just invited back to their hut is infact a 30 stone, crooked nose old hag.)
At this point I decided to stop the comparisons as they are stupid. Not all women have small incapable hands, a short attention span, and no hand eye coordination. Equally not all men have large hands, short hair, or the need to yell obscenities. I then got thinking about speed typing secretaries and how good they would be at commanding a PC team. Does this mean women can only play PC games… no, of course it doesn’t.
My conclusion is that men and women are exactly the same when it comes to gaming, and to prove this I have created a diagram pointing out the key features needed to be a gamer ...
The only valid differences I can see is that some men are misogynistic pigs and some women are small minded about games. The world must change!
